Archive for the ‘Software Development’ Category

Software Engineer with his wife

See if anyone can relate to this:

Husband – Hey dear, I am logged in.

Wife – Would you like to have some snacks?
Husband – Hard disk full.

Wife – Have you brought my dress.
Husband – Bad command or file name.

Wife – But I told you about it in morning
Husband – Erroneous syntax, abort, retry, cancel.

Wife – Oh God! Forget it where’s your salary.
Husband – File in use, read only, try after some time.

Wife – At least give me your credit card, i can do some shopping.
Husband – Sharing violation, access denied.

Wife – I made a mistake in marrying you.
Husband – Data type mismatch.

Wife – You are useless.
Husband – By default.

Wife – Who was there with you in the car this morning?
Husband – System unstable press ctrl, alt, del to Reboot.

Wife – What is the relation between you and your Receptionist?
Husband – The only user with write permission.

Wife – What is my value in your life?
Husband – Unknown virus detected.

Wife – Do you love me or your computer?
Husband – Too many parameters..

Wife – I will go to my dad’s house.
Husband – Program performed illegal operation, it will Close.

Wife – I will leave you forever.
Husband – close all programs and log out for another User.

Wife – It is worthless talking to you.
Husband – shut down the computer.

Wife – I am going
Husband – Its now safe to turn off your computer.

War on Terror – Project Management perspective

Everyday we see a number of analysts, politicans, journalists, etc presenting their views on the war on terror and its implication. Here I present my analysis on the subject from an angle that I can very easily relate to:

Client: USA
Contract: Economic aid, military aid, $$$
Development Methodology: Outsourced, iterative development
Project: War on Terror
Business Development Manager: Mr. Asif Zardari
Project Manager: General Ashfaq Parvez Kayani
Analysis Team: Inter-Services Intelligence (ISI)
Development Team: Pakistan Army, Frontier Corps
Development Environment: Federally Administered Tribal Areas
Development Tools: Guns, tanks, artillery, etc
Third Party Support: Drone attacks, CIA intelligence, etc
Quality Assurance: Media, NGOs, journalists, etc
Recent Client Meeting: Asif Zardari’s visit to US from May 5 to May 8, 2009
Recent Published Release: Operation in Swat
Recent Milestone: US approval of additional $1.9 billion in aid to Pakistan

Hug a Developer

If you are a software developer, you can definitely relate to some or may be all of it